


You taught me to phase and along the way, you taught me how to love

by Creativityx



Category: Warrior Nun (TV)
Genre: All the times Ava phased and the one time she didn't, F/F, a 5+1 fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-08
Updated: 2020-10-08
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:01:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26891833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Creativityx/pseuds/Creativityx
Summary: All the time's Ava phased in response to Beatrice. From her first attempt in training to all the moments she did it by mistake, landing in Beatrice's room and the one time she just entered through the door.
Relationships: Sister Beatrice/Ava Silva
Comments: 5
Kudos: 224





	You taught me to phase and along the way, you taught me how to love

When Ava learned how to phase. She never wanted to give it up. It was both thrilling and terrifying. Each moment she just phased at a hit? It was bearable feeling. But when she phased through walls and other objects? She could feel their _weight,_ dragging her down.

Yet, still, she _loved it,_ even when it brought her those fears. Because in every moment she phased? Was another reminder that she was real, that she was here, existing and in those walls, she could _feel everything around her._

It was heavy, _but she could feel it._ That alone was incredible. The ability to feel, something she had given up on being able to do so long ago.

But with this ability came much practice. It started off simple. She was to test her abilities in sparring matches and nothing more.

Mother Superion had described the ability to phase as a tool in combat and nothing more, _how could she not see it as more?_

She had attempted many times with a range of recruits. Always trying to land that final hit, and sometimes _she would phase at just the right moment and do that._

Yet? It wasn’t enough. She needed to always be able to phase, _needed the consistency_ or she would fail to protect them Superion had told her, her words harsh and cutting. _Ava knew it was the truth._

Once she had been able to take down a few of the recruits she was told she needed to face a better opponent, a true test of _whether she was actually capable_.

It was Beatrice who accepted that role, to test Ava, though they had sparred so many times before, _Ava losing every time_.

She took her stance on the sparring mat looking ready to take Ava down if that _playful smile_ was any indicator.

Ava stepped up onto the mat across from Beatrice, nervous, _excited,_ hoping this time she would be able to beat her. _To understand how her powers work_ and actually use them to win a match, _to be useful to her Bea._

'Beatrice,' she had said with a grin as they got into the starting positions.

Beatrice had laughed at the formality, so used to Ava calling her Bea, 'Ava.'

Like always, their movements in sparring were balanced, one supporting the other so clearly, able to perceive how the other would respond and blocking it. _Ava knew_ that if she was going to win? She would need to _phase._

The next time Beatrice went to land a hit? Ava focused on the halo, _feeling it flare,_ the warmth surrounding her and upon opening her eyes she watched as Beatrice's training staff phased through her body.

‘I did it,’ she whispered to herself, her eyes widening in joy, _she did it,_ she could use the halo for something more than just coincidental success in fights.

‘You did,’ Beatrice responded, having heard her, _she mustn’t have been whispering in her excitement._

Beatrice took that as a challenge and soon Ava was dodging and blocking every hit Beatrice threw at her with her training staff.

Each time Beatrice was able to land them, instead of defeat, _Ava could phase through them._ Every time a hit landed and she phased her confidence in her abilities grew, _she could finally be useful._

She watched as Beatrice grew tired, her brow furrowing as she tried to work out how to win the match.

The other girl trying an assortment on moves with the staff, still being unable to land a single one with how Ava was using the halo, her back flaring brighter each time with the light as she used it.

At the end of it all? Beatrice’s hits became slower and Ava was able to phase and use her staff to flip Beatrice onto her back.

Beatrice just smiled before pushing herself off the ground, 'That was exceptional Ava, you have a gift with the halo, _I'm proud of how far you've come.'_

Ava could only watch as Beatrice moved to put her staff back on the weapons rack and leave the training room.

_She hadn't been expecting Beatrice to be proud of her... It was comforting_ to be seen as more than the halo bearer, _to be seen as Ava. Someone so desperately trying to prove herself to them all._

The second time, she just wanted to see the girl, it had been two weeks since their last meeting, Beatrice having gone off on a mission with Mary.

  
Ava couldn't deny that she just missed her presence. Missed the way she would smile at her in the halls, would run a hand down her arm, _helping Ava feel something, feel someone's touch._

She had heard of Beatrice's return, _informed that the mission had gone poorly and both she and Mary were exhausted from it all._ She knew Beatrice wouldn't come to visit, would head straight to her room.

Ava still didn't want to be apart from her. Her body's response to those _thoughts_ was _unconscious,_ she hadn't meant for it to happen. But suddenly? She had phased through multiple walls and found herself standing in the middle of Beatrice's room _eyes wide._

Beatrice sat there on her bed looking shocked, _her hair was down,_ her clothing rumpled from her efforts the past two weeks. _She looked almost fearful at being exposed._

Ava panicked, 'Bea- shit sorry, I didn't mean to!' She ran her hands through her hair trying to find a way to explain it all.

'I was thinking of you and _missing you,_ and you know suddenly I'm here... in your room.'

She bowed her head, waiting for Beatrice to be angry and her invading her space, another slew of apologies ready on her tongue for the girl.

She felt a hand on her own and looked up to see that Beatrice had moved off of the bed and was standing in front of her _a gentle smile gracing her features._

'I'm not _mad,_ Ava, you're still learning that's not a bad thing.'

Ava frowned harder at those words, lowering her head once more, feeling scorned. _Still learning, Beatrice had said. She hated that she was still learning, making all these mistakes in front of Bea._

Beatrice let out a contemplative sound before lifting Ava's head to look at her once more, 'I _missed you too Ava,’_ she sighed as she looked at her clearly, 'It just seemed improper to _bother you_ at this hour.'

'I wanted to see you,' Beatrice admitted before continuing, 'It was hard to enter my quarters and know that after two weeks I couldn't spend a moment with you no matter _how much_ I wanted to.'

Beatrice ran her hands down both of Ava's arms, the comfort from her touch soothing _her panicked mind,_ she had just phased through all those walls because she... _missed Beatrice?_ It was an overwhelming thought.

She felt her arm tugged at when she seemed to have missed some of Beatrice's words if the worried look on the other girl's face was any indication. Soon she was sitting on Beatrice's bed side-by-side and she had _no idea_ what she should say.

Beatrice spoke for her, 'Your phasing is a lot better than Shannon's when she first got the halo.' Ava watched as a nostalgic look took hold of Beatrice's face.

'Shannon? The one that-' Ava cut herself off, _the one that they had lost to be replaced with by her._

'Yes, that Shannon,' Beatrice said, smiling in spite of her _loss._

'She was terribly clumsy with it and would be set off by the slightest of actions, _touches,_ sparring matches. She was a _mess.'_ Beatrice had begun to laugh as she regaled the story to Ava, gripping Ava's shoulder to support herself.

'The one time that I remember most fondly? Was when she and Mary had kissed in the training room.'

Ava could only smile imagining a _Mary so happy. Though she had found comfort in Lilith now, they were good for each other._

'What happened?' Ava asked a grin starting to form at realising she wasn't the only _messy_ halo bearer that had existed.

'She _tripped,_ falling against one of the walls and phased right through it,' Beatrice wiped her eyes as tears began to form from laughing so hard, 'It took us a _whole_ hour to find her again.'

After she had finished the story, Beatrice turned contemplative, looking over at Beatrice was a soft smile and pulling her against her side, 'What I'm saying, Ava, is that we all _fail_ at the start but you've already improved so much, will continue to improve.'

Ava watched as Beatrice turned her body to face her fully, 'Your achievements are your own, _but they are extensive._ We all have seen it; we all believe in you.'

Ava ignored the way her eyes began to water, 'You do?'

Beatrice just nodded her head. It was _enough._ More than enough. When Ava left the room, she tried for the door but in her flurry of emotions at the day, _phased right through it._

The third time, months had passed, she was in control of it all and more than capable at preventing herself from phasing needlessly, _from phasing just because she liked Beatrice._

They had all been given the day off from training. Ava had spent most of the day sitting with Camila at the piano trying to learn how to play.

She figured that Beatrice liked these things, _the sound of music flowing,_ had spoken about how she wished she could listen to the _hum_ of classical musical at night after a long day of training or missions.

Ava wanted to be the one that gave her that, _the feeling of calm after the loudness of a day._ So, she sat at Camila's side and tried to hold back her groans when every key she pressed sounded worse than the last.

'Camila this is _terrible,'_ Ava huffed, thumping her head against the keys, _growing more frustrated at the loud sound the action let out._

'These things take time Ava, just like learning to control the halo, you need to have discipline, and more than anything _patience.'_

Ava just pressed her fingers back to the keys, _hating the sounds she was creating, these weren't calming._

She soon felt a hand on hers pulling her away from them once more, 'If you told me why you wanted to play it so badly it might help me work out what to teach you.'

Ava tried to ignore the heat that rose in her cheeks at being caught out by the girl, 'Promise you won’t tell anyone?'

Camila gave her a playful grin at those words, 'Cross my heart.'

She felt herself sigh as she spoke, 'I want to learn for _Bea,'_ she admitted, 'She told me once that classical music is _soothing,_ this isn't going to soothe her.'

She felt a hand press firmly against her back, Camila again, the halo was flaring in response to her emotions, _it still did that despite all her efforts._

'Well, maybe if we change pace... Try this instead?'

Camila played a different piece, it was _soothing,_ Ava felt herself relax just hearing it as each key was pressed delicately.

It took weeks of late-night training before she could perfect it enough to feel confident at playing it for Beatrice but _she felt like she could do it, soothe Beatrice in the way the girl did so easily just through simple touches._

She was too excited, her nervous energy skyrocketing at the thought and just as she had done all the months ago? During the night she phased straight through the walls into Beatrice's room.

Beatrice only laughed at the sight of her this time, seeing that she wasn't in distress, afraid of her reactions as she had been before.

They were both in their sleepwear at this point, it would hardly be appropriate, 'Come with me?' Ava asked her, hoping she would accept.

'Wearing this?' Beatrice gestured down to her outfit.

'I'll be the only one who sees,' Ava smiled softly at the action.

'Well alright then.'

She tugged at Beatrice with urgency until they were in front of the piano, pulling her to sit beside her on the bench.

'What is this for?' Beatrice questioned; _Camila was always the one playing the piano._

'Just listen.' Ava began to play, only stumbling over a few keys, hearing as each key let out a sound, filling the cathedral halls, echoing with quiet reverence. She chanced a look at Beatrice and saw the way the girl was smiling at her; _it was more than enough._

When she finished, Beatrice’s eyes were brighter than she had seen them in weeks, the girl asking, 'What was that for?'

Ava rubbed the back of her neck, 'You always offer me _comfort,_ I wanted to be the one who gave it to you this time.'

Ava's face grew incredibly red when Beatrice placed a kiss against the hands that had been on the keys, 'I _loved_ it Ava, _thank you.'_

With that they rose from the seat and went their separate ways, _the smiles leaving neither of their faces as they drifted off to sleep in their own beds._

The fourth time was because she was running painfully late to their meeting. They had all agreed that at 6 am they'd be in Beatrice's room, ready to plan for their next mission.

It was 6:30. _Ava was painfully late, especially by Lilith's standards._ In her rush to get to Beatrice's room, she ended up slipping and _phasing through a wall._

She knew that if she was phasing now? She might as well continue and with a couple more carefully planned phases had found herself tumbling through a wall and onto the floor of Beatrice's room.

So, she lay there on the floor and could only offer an awkward grin from her position as four sets of eyes glared down at her in disapproval, _including Beatrice's._

She just rolled on the floor away from them until she could stand up again, 'Hey! Uh- I'm here!'

'You're late,' Lilith had huffed out shouldering her in her frustration at it all, '6 am Ava, 6 am. We even pushed it back from 5 am for you.'

She looked about ready to take Ava to the sparring mat and teach her a lesson had it not been for Mary's wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her away from Ava.

They planned idly together for the next couple of hours. Beatrice and Ava ended up leaning against each other, _holding hands,_ _when did they shift to holding hands?_

The longer their planning dragged on the closer the two got until Ava, _still exhausted_ from not being used to waking up so early, found her head in Beatrice's lap.

She was ready to move, _didn't want to make Beatrice uncomfortable._ But Beatrice kept taking, defining her plan and _running a hand through Ava's hair._ She couldn't help but melt at the motion, Beatrice always knew how to _soothe her._

'We'll be moving together, all of us, as a team to this location,' Beatrice spoke, running her spare hand down the map to pinpoint the location.

'Ava and I will take this path,' _Ava could only watch as her hand continued to draw a line,_

'Camila will take a vantage point,' _another hand movement,_ 'While Mary and Lilith take defensive positions from this location.'

Ava continued to watch as Beatrice planned, _she was in awe of her talents._

When Beatrice's hand stilled in her hair as the other girls began to raise their own ideas on how to handle the mission? Ava used her own to pull it away and towards her.

She returned the kiss to them that Beatrice has given her _when she would play the piano, every single time, a kiss to her hands in appreciation._

'These hands give me _such a beautiful thing,’ Beatrice_ had told her when Ava questioned it once.

She watched as Beatrice's face grew red this time, _using her other hand to run along Ava's cheek,_ the girl only able to lean into the touch.

When the planning was over, they parted ways, Ava giving them all a playful smile as she left the same way she entered, _phasing through the wall._

The fifth time? It was different. They had been wandering idly around the cat's cradle, _hand in hand,_ as had become the norm for them just talking about anything that crossed their minds.

Ava was swinging their arms wildly in her joy at spending time with Beatrice, Beatrice only laughing and steadying her motions once more.

'You should have seen me on the training mat with Lilith yesterday, Bea!' She exclaimed her movements growing overly energetic once more.

'I phased through _every last hit_ she threw at me,' Ava continued, the glee in her eyes apparent, ‘She was so furious, her face scrunched up like,' _Ava offered her the expression, it was absolutely ridiculous, she knew that, but loved the way it made Beatrice smile._

'Mary had to hold her back at the end of it all,' she said, her joy still clear, 'I've never been able to _phase_ like that, it's never been that easy.'

She turned to face Beatrice, pulling both her hands into her own and holding them against her chest, 'But Lilith said she was _proud of me_ afterwards, Mary too.'

Her face was aching from how much she was smiling, 'I don't think I'd ever have been able to do this without you.'

Beatrice gave her that same gentle smile she always did, _she loved receiving it,_ 'You have grown in ways I could have never envisioned Ava,' she made sure her hands remained in Ava's as she continued, 'You _inspire me every day,_ and I love that I have been a part of it all.'

_Love. Lately... When the two of them shared their joys? Words of love slipped in there. Ava wished she knew what it means. Wanted it to mean love, real love between them._

She knew her expression must have changed; knew she had loosened her grip on Beatrice's hands. _Was it too much to ask for Beatrice to love her like that?_

Beatrice suddenly had her pulled her into her arms, a firm embrace, _chest to chest,_ they had rarely been so close, 'You know what else I love? More than just your achievements Ava?'

_‘What?'_ Ava whispered, _desperate._

'You.'

With those words, she felt her head being pulled towards Beatrice, _was she going to..._

Soon Ava felt lips against her own, soft, _yearning,_ full of all their untapped emotions shared in every moment she phased to be near Beatrice, in every moment they had held each other, _praised the other and fought on missions together._

When Beatrice drew back, her eyes still hooded as she took Ava in? Ava could only let out a happy sound, ' _I love you Bea- I love you, I love you,’_ each time whispered like a mantra.

The rest of the day was spent in each other's arms. At night? They still went to their separate rooms, _though things had inexplicably shifted between them_

Though Ava certainly almost _phased_ through that wall in her elation.

The final time? There wasn't any phasing involved around Beatrice, not after the mission.

Their mission was tough, the battle drawing on and despite their planning? _They couldn't have prepared for this._ Beatrice and Ava had been split off into separate teams, Ava with Mary and Beatrice with Lilith.

The area with filling with wraith demons and Ava could only shout out their locations desperately every time one drew close, _too close_ to the people she loved.

'Mary to your left, I- up higher! Yes, there get it!' she shouted every command with increased panic, there was _so many of them,_ too many for such a small team to be assigned to, _the reports hadn't mentioned any of this._

Mary struck the wraith demon down and another soon took its place in the battle against them, _each attack was relentless,_ Ava knew the halo was flaring with her emotions, _she was terrified that one wrong callout?_ They could get seriously hurt.

She had called out the position this time to Beatrice, 'Behind you Bea!'

Beatrice hadn't heard her, so focused on the ones in front of her, _they were getting too close,_ she could see that they would hit her if she didn't act, with those _claws._ She didn't want to see Beatrice hurt; _the halo would heal her she told herself._

At that moment she ran across the room and with only moments to spare, _dove in front of that claw,_ feeling the halo flare, _pain shooting through her_ as they dug into her skin.

She cried out in agony and could only fall, _Beatrice turning to her in panic,_ catching her in her arms.

'Ava! Why did you do that, _you shouldn't have done that,_ I could have-'

Ava just grimaced in response, 'You didn't hear me, _it was too close,_ I have the halo, it'll be okay.'

With their halo bearer injured they knew this wasn't a fight, they would win today, each girl moving towards Ava and evacuating the area, _Mary carrying Ava in her arms,_ Beatrice's barely able to look at her in such a state.

When they returned to the cat's cradle, it only took a day for Ava to heal, for all traces of the injury to be removed from her, _she knew it wouldn't have been removed from Beatrice, thought what she had done was right._

But Beatrice didn't leave her room for breakfast that morning or sparring in the evening and Ava was worried.

When she asked Mary and Lilith about it, they could only offer her a pat to her shoulder and the resolute words, 'Go talk to her.'

Ava thought about it. About using the halo to _phase into the room,_ but she knew that wasn't right.

It took her time to muster up the courage to face Beatrice but soon was knocking at her bedroom door, 'Bea?' she called out.

There was no response. _But... in her silence? She could hear the sound almost like tears._

She tried the door handle and to her surprise, it was unlocked. Pushing the door open her heart ached at the sight of her _Bea,_ curled up on her bed with tears staining her face.

Ava moved quickly across the room, hopping on the bed and pulling Beatrice into her arms, 'Why are you crying, Bea? Is it something I did? I'm sorry,' Ava spoke, her concern clear, _'I'm so sorry. for whatever I've done.'_

Beatrice only pressed her head against Ava's chest, 'I _love you_ Ava don't you realise that?'

Ava went to respond but Beatrice continued, 'I love you and, on our mission, you were so ready to fall. _I love you and I almost lost you before I could do anything more than kiss you.'_

Ava felt the girl shake against her; _she hadn't realised how afraid Beatrice had been for her._

Beatrice's voice grew smaller, 'What if the halo _wasn't enough?'_

Ava just leant back so she could see Beatrice's eyes, ' _I'm sorry that I hurt you, but I'm here and I will love you for all my life if you'll let me.'_

She watched as a smile began to form on Beatrice's face and could only do one thing in response, drawing her into a kiss filled with the _aching_ they shared for each other in those moments during the mission, _and the day they had spent apart._

When they pulled way? Ava knew she wouldn't need to phase into Beatrice's room anymore. She pulled the cover's over them both and they drifted into sleep in each other's arms that night and every night afterwards.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this on discord, downloaded it and then just forgot to upload it here wow, but hope you enjoyed!


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